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The Relationship Within

RHS Student, Johanna Zamano, shares her take on the relationship you have with yourself


By Valeria Rubio


Zamano posing with a skeleton in her Language of Medicine class.

A relationship can be a connection you have between family, friends, a pet or a lover. At least that’s what everyone assumes when they hear “relationship.”


To Rialto High School junior Johanna Zamano, the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.


Zamano believes that to the majority of people, a relationship is always talked about as “a guy and a girl or significant other.”


“What about the relationship you have with yourself?” asks Zamano. “I feel that communicating with yourself and your needs and wants is the most important thing as doing what’s best for yourself is important.”


Zamano is concerned with the lack of connection people have with themselves. “A lot of people don't understand what it really means to have a good relationship with yourself.” Zamano adds, “There’s a fine line between being selfish and selfless. There are times to do both, but having a good and healthy relationship with yourself should be the main goal. There tends to be a lot of confusion with being selfish and selfless.”


Zamano shared a time in her life when she was called selfish and lost some of her friends at Rialto for choosing herself. “It hurt seeing people switch up on me for trying to take care of myself for once. People show their true colors when you aren’t a benefit to them anymore.” Zamano’s tone seemed to be less enthusiastic as she shared her experience. She shares that the girls she used to be friends with never caused any problems with her but that they made her feel invisible.


To Zamano, self-care was necessary to get out of her bad habits. “The relationship I have with myself is important because there was a time in my life when I didn’t value or respect myself and it wasn’t healthy for me or the people around me.”


“I was probably at my lowest and it was when I was alone where I felt like I needed change.” Zamano shares that ever since she started high school, she’s felt distant from her family and that she doesn’t feel comfortable sharing her emotions at home. “I usually just talk to my friends to distract myself.”


Zamano then shares different ways she cares for herself. “I mostly listen to music, I play volleyball and it’s a good outlet for me.” Zamano says her playlist consists of different genres of music and she describes it as “really random.”


“I can go from listening to the Smiths to bumping Future.” She enjoys the spontaneity of her playlists. Volleyball has also always been a part of Zamano’s life since middle school and she says it’s a fun escape from reality and helps her destress.


“Imma just keep putting myself first and let whoever stays in my life stay. I’m not gonna waste my energy on people who wouldn’t even check in on me.”


To Zamano, self-care is going to remain a priority so she can continue to maintain a healthy relationship with herself because she knows it's for the best.


9 comments

9 Comments


Acknowledging that you're not okay and need to change is always the first step to something good. People often have a misconception on being selfish when it really isn't a bad thing when it's for your own well being. Taking care of yourself is and should be the first priority so I am pleased to hear how Johanna carries herself.

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Samuel Llamas
Samuel Llamas
Nov 09, 2023

The Courage needed to take such actions as Johanna's is immense, which I greatly commend and hope many people also start to see as necessary. A part of life is change whether good or bad but when signs show you its necessary we mustn't let any thing or person hold us back, which is why it is important like Johanna said to have a great relationship with oneself and fully love and trust in your own person.

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I agree completely that you have to love yourself before you can love others. When you love yourself, you find a lot of peace with yourself and find your worth. When you know your worth, you won't put up with anyone else's drama, and it's peaceful. Good article.

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I strongly agree with Johanna. Self love is the key to everything. Your friends may not always be there to support you, but you can always support and motivate yourself. I've always believed you can't love someone if you don't truly love yourself. In this article Johanna's self reflection and words are inspiring to me.

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Caroline G
Caroline G
Nov 08, 2023

There are many people that don't understand what it means to truly love yourself. For Johanna to understand her emotions and actually get out of her bad habits is incredible!

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