Jacky Penilla’s experiences with fake friends vs. genuine connections

Betsy Garcia

Jacky Penilla, a sophomore at Rialto High School, has gained valuable insights from her personal experiences navigating friendships and difficult social situations as a student. She hopes that by sharing her story, other students can learn important lessons about self-respect and the true meaning of friendship. 

As Penilla explains, friendships are not defined by how long you have known someone, but by how they treat you. She states, “Friends are sometimes either going to bring you down or lift you up, and the number of years you have spent with a person does not determine your friendship.” This realization came through a painful but important experience during her eighth-grade year.

Penilla recalls becoming very close with a friend, someone she trusted deeply and even introduced to her family. For a time, everything felt normal and secure. However, things began to change in February of 2024. Penilla noticed her friend behaving differently, often prioritizing her boyfriend over their friendship. She began leaving Penilla out and choosing a man who had made hurtful comments about her friend, including calling her “good fat,” which deeply damaged the way Penilla thought. In addition, Penilla felt like she was no longer a priority, only being invited to spend time together when other plans fell through. This shift made Penilla feel undervalued and disrespected.

As time went on, Penilla grew emotionally exhausted from being treated as a second option. Although it was difficult, she made the decision to distance herself from the friendship. She admits that the process was painful, especially because she once believed they had a strong bond. 

Jacky Penilla for Rialto High People

Penilla shares, “It did hurt me when we were drifting away, but at the same time she constantly made me feel like a second choice.” Despite the sadness, she recognized that she deserved better treatment and healthier relationships.

This experience taught Penilla an important lesson about self-worth and boundaries. She realized that it is essential to put oneself first when others fail to show respect or kindness. Walking away from a toxic friendship is not easy, but it can be necessary for personal growth and emotional well-being.

Penilla now understands that true friends uplift and support each other rather than compete for attention or diminish one another’s value.